Welcome. This is an unofficial blog for Beaconsfield squash club.
Here you'll be able to access info about team matches, keep tabs on divisional positions,
and get updates on squash and racketball events and any forthcoming social activity.
It could also be the place to start (and end) rumours, and indulge in healthy banter.
There's bound to be the odd thing that offends; but that's alright isn't it, us being adults?
If you're truly miffed just email me and I'll remove the offending article.
You'll also be able to post a blog yourself; I am your host so, simply email me your piece/rant/match report/poetry/recipe for tripe to:
trev@lisacottage.demon.co.uk
I'll put it up 'in the cloud' and folk will then be able to comment or heckle...
So come on, email your pieces or add your comments below what is already posted there.

Monday 4 February 2013

Bears Double-Header Report: CB Upstarts & Holmer Green

Bears skipper Captain Kangaroo (Dave Fielding) writes:

With us playing our home games on a Thursday and away ones on a Tuesday we tend to get these back-to-back matches, but I guess that means you get two reports for the price of one click on Jones’ website, which has to be a good thing. Plus the fact that since neither Dirty Dan nor Gorgeous Gareth bother writing for it any more (la la la far too posh and important for proletariat stuff like blogs don’t you know who I am? etc), what else have you got to read if not the latest Bull & Bear sagas?

Well, first up was the return of the Chesham Bois Upstarts, who are having a pretty shocking season and are in the middle of a relegation dogfight with the Bulls, 1879 and the RAF. Ian told me specifically to “mash the b******ds”, which I though was a bit ungentlemanly and most unlike him, but pressure does that to a man. Poor thing. Normally, we would have been happy to oblige but I was fielding a weakened team for once: Dave Powell was “unavailable” (business? – “no”. Skiing? – “no”. What then? – “not telling”. Hmmmmm...), Phil had torn bits of his stomach against the CB Seniors the previous week, and Lady Bear was in Leeds. And not even to watch the Mighty Whites. I mean, what other reason is there to go to Leeds, huh? Pathetic.

Still, it looked a strong enough team on paper to do the business and we could have should have. Andrew Egan made his traditional bi-monthly guest appearance for us and ground out an impressively resilient win in an bizarre game against Paul Barlington: 2/9, 9/0, 10/8, 10/8. There is a story in that if you care to work it out. He’s pure Welsh grit (or should that be a Welsh git?) and excellent value at no 4. Maintains his sparse but 100% record.

Olly Reeves was cruising at no. 2 against the hyper-fit Steve Sieff when I arrived. 2-0 up and back to his old self. He even had a match point in the 4th but disaster struck in the form of a contentious marking call by Adam. Unfortunately for all those watching, he let it get to him in the way that I let Trevor’s claptrap worm its way into my brain against the Bulls and he lost 9/1 in the 5th.

1-1 and into round 2. Richard Graham at no.5 started off like a train against Andy King who was fit as a butcher’s dog but couldn’t hit anything off the back wall. Richard can be imperious when he is relaxed and in control, but curiously tenses up with the victory line in sight. I put it down to his youthful inexperience. He did mention a painful shoulder halfway through, but if that did affect things he didn’t show nor blame it. Andy nudged it 9-7 in the 5th, a triumph of stamina over skill.

Adam was on the other court and made short work of young James Pearson, who arrived wearing a Cambridge University Squash Team hoodie but left shellshocked having got a real lesson in how to play squash, gaining only 6 points in total. I encountered him in the changing rooms shaking his head. I don’t think it consoled him much to be told that we do that often as well, but usually at Adam’s jokes.

So, down to El Capitano at no. 3 against the South African Wayne Scott. I put it down to my youthful inexperience that I clearly couldn’t handle the pressure of being 2-2 and all on me to continue the winning streak that extended back months. Personally, I blame the rest of my team for leaving me in this position. It is completely irrelevant that Wayne very unsportingly played a blinder and took me apart with some superb retrieving and tight work down the wall, which neutralized my attacking volleying game.

So, a disappointing 14-10 loss which definitely represents snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Could easily have been a 4-1 win, but nevertheless I was confident that it was just a blip and things would be back to normal when I was back to my usual team away at Holmer Green. As described by our guest columnist this week: the maestro himself, Phil Alexander…..

………………………..

Debuting as match reporter for the first time (my opinions and ratings in italics) this season the Bears after an uncharacteristic (close) loss last week arrived at the hottest courts in Bucks unsure of the team that HG may be fielding. Our erstwhile Captain Dave, captaining arguably the strongest squad in the Division needed a win from everyone as ‘percentages’ were already being discussed in the changing rooms and the desire to stay in the top three remained strong

As it turned out we won comfortably 4-1 (17-3); however, the 100% record of our Lady Bear Smalley took a dint as she went down 3-1 at no.4 to a young spotty opponent Matt, who crashed the ball around too quickly in boiling conditions. The sauna-like temperatures didn’t let Jo settle into her normal crafty pace changing game - slightly cooler and she would have had him ………………… (2 out of 5 - looked sweaty at the end ……….)

At the same time as Jo was battling away DP was engaging at no.2 in his normal ‘thumpy thumpy’ style of play against a significantly (or it looked that way) older player Darren Thompson, who played awkward / unorthodox shots mainly to the front – slightly hiccupping in the second where he allowed his man too much time. Ultimately Dave’s relentless pace was too much and after 30 minutes he was back in the changing rooms 3-0, so one all by 8.30pm then (4 out of 5 – looked a bit sweaty at the end but not bad for once a week….. )

Next on was the author, who had missed last week due to a bit of a ‘lower gut strain’ ………. apart from a small hiccup in the 2nd he also managed to beat a tall lanky chap who fortunately made too many errors on a v hot court 3-0 (4 out of 5 - its all in the opponent selection and not too sweaty…. )

At the same time, team jester AP was thrashing young Dan for a handful of points for an easy 3-0 win and to keep his post Christmas run at 100% . The ‘Insanity’ regime must be working (4 out of 5 - only to be expected not sweaty )

Finally it was Captain Fielding’s job to bring home another 3-0 win – I didn’t see the game but Dave appears to be specialising in taking on teenage opposition, ‘intimidating ‘ them and winning. Although this game had none of the challenges he’d faced over 5 games against 13yr old Amy Jones of Chesham………… but a win is a win 3-0 (3 out of 5 – not as humorous as his Amy game -probably sweaty …..)

Overall an excellent result against highly placed opposition and quite a nice curry as well. El Capitano will doubtless be feeling happy that competition appears to be hotting up for team places but the team should now be ‘well’ safe from relegation and therefore it should be possible to manage the next few games using the full range of squad supporting players at his disposal ………………………………………………………………. (provided everyone wins that is )

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